Wrong-Placed Pity

[December 1938]

"Alright. We’re taking the winter break. But don't forget to come back here in 4th February next year," said Alexandrov.

"Understood, Maestro," the artists of the Alexandrov Ensemble replied in unison.

"That concludes our final concert this December. See you later... and happy incoming new year!" Alexandrov quipped before leaving the hall. The artists quickly dispersed and boarded onto the tram. That including Alexei, Dmitry, Vadim and Vasily.

"Lyosha, what's your plan?" asked Vadim.

Alexei hummed, "I will go to Leningrad tomorrow till next week. There is a reunion plan with my old university friends. Might as well rehearse and perform small concert for the reunion party. What about you?"

"Moonlighting, as usual. But you said it's tomorrow... so... Dima, can you stay at my place tomorrow?" Vadim then poked Dmitry. It seems Dmitry lost in thought for some minutes, because he blinked like someone who just woke up. 

"Huh? Hah? What happened to Vasya?" Dmitry asked, followed by Alexei's nod in curiosity too.

Vasily chimed in smug, "Well, I am going to Tver tomorrow. I will have some 14 days of romantic trip with my beloved doctor-UGHHH!!"

"So what do you say?" Vadim asked hopefully, while his hand tousled Vasily's face to shut his natter.

Dmitry nodded enthusiastically. "Sure, but I can only stay for seven days. I have to prepare for the incoming sheep..."

"Seven days... well, it means you can stay at mine first. Then next week, you take turn with Lyosha. Is it okay?" wondered Vadim as he take off his hand from Vasily, letting Vasily breathed and smack Vadim's back.

"No problem at all! We are gladly help pushing your problem, Vadik!" Alexei patted Vadim's shoulder.

Vadim gazed at them, pulling the small smile to see everyone were elated. "Make the most of your holiday, alright? Don't make yourself ended up in hospital, or jail, or newspaper," he said sarcastically. 

Alexei and Vasily looked at Vadim in confusion, but both men then chuckled, "Yeah, for sure~"

The tram goes on again. Vadim's face slightly changed to confusion in less than a minute. "Wait a minute. Dima, you said you were preparing for sheep. What happened?"

With a grimace, Dmitry stuttered, "Oh, sheep... bread! Yeah, I planned to experimenting on new shape of bread."

Both Vadim, Vasily, and Alexei furrowed their eyebrows. Though before anyone spoke, the bell rang in certain stop. Vadim and Vasily hopped down and they bid farewell.

As the tram moved away again, Dmitry rested his chin on his hand and yawned, bored by the ride. Soon, they arrived at next stop, where Dmitry and Alexei transferred from tram number 10 to number 16. Tram number 16 moved quite quickly; the streets were no longer fully buried in snow, but still slushy from the melting drifts. Alexei can see Dmitry now spent the ride, by jotting down a list. Occasionally, he paused and reread... made Alexei curious enough to peek.

> Visit Stalingrad

> Slaughter sheep meat

> Grill shaslik

> Keep stock for winter

> Attend Ismail's wedding

> Prepare more shashlik for Alexei, Vadim and Vasily for next February

"Whoa, is my Dima writing a diary?" Alexei teased.

Dmitry startled and responded to the jest with a small yet awkward smile. "A diary? Hmm, I guess you could call it a diary about my bread."

His guilelessly reply that drew a chuckle from Alexei. "Come on, Dima. You are a bad liar! It's okay, I won't laugh. Just... tell me. I promise I won't tell Vadik and Vasya as usual!"

Suddenly the tram stopped in next stop, and it made Dmitry quickly jumped out of the tram. "Dmitry? Where are you going?" shocked Alexei.

Dmitry turned to Alexei, his voice raised since he was already outside the tram as he called out, "I’m going to the bakery first! See you later!"

"Ah uh... alright, take care!" Alexei said, continuing his journey alone. Dmitry crossed the street and walked away in hurry.


He watched Dmitry from a distance, till Dmitry can't be seen again through window. "Poor kid... Stuck in the big city without family, always being avoidant no matter I try make him sociable..." Alexei thought.

But Alexei's mind now burnt so much to know that name. Ismail. He was also surprised to see a non Russian or Ukrainian name in that list... Sure Dmitry ever tell about him used to be fostered by neighbor from Stalingrad. But Dmitry never tell the full identity to Alexei or anyone. He only mentioned the neighbor as "new mama", "new papa", "new brothers".

He shook his head, steering away the creeping jealousy that Dmitry still not trusting him enough. But after thinking again, interrogating Dmitry will make that black-haired man more uncomfortable. Maybe... maybe Dmitry will open more to him. Someday...

Therefore, Alexei trying to thinking different stuff. He start listing the same measure of pity for his friends...

Vadim, for example, never went home either; he knew Vadim grew up in a strange cult family, and Vadim had decided to run away and live independently.

Well, leaving home over family disputes and striving for independence was commonplace in the Soviet Union... many members of the Alexandrov Ensemble had experienced it. There was Fyodor, who constantly quarreled with his mother's side of the family. Semyon, too, casted out by his relatives for his obsession with supernatural. And there are frequent cases of divorce or dysfunctional family, spiked after The Great Purge happens and ended. And so Alexei concluded; in this pathetic years, by simply staying alive and surviving no matter what... was an achievement in itself....


He blinked, realizing he had already passed the last stop. Alexei quickly got off, tossed an eight-kopeck coin to the conductor, ran to his communal before his feet frozen from walking too long. As he stepped into his communal, Alexei wrote everything to the diary... including his jealousy over that non-Russian name.